Five best ways to annoy a Londoner on public transport in London.

There are things you should really avoid doing on public transport in London. Otherwise you will annoy a Londoner or two. Or more.

Listening to music really loudly so that the whole bus or carriage can hear how cool you are through the loud beats banging your ears.
When the whole bus or tube knows you’re listening to some really cool music. [TheLondonY]
Standing on the left on the stairs. In an ideal world, the whole of London would be happy to stand on the left, to stand everywhere, not do anything, relax…But this is impossible. We live in London, so we are busy, grumpy, claustrophobic people always on a rush and we want to get out of the underground ASAP. If you’re standing in the way, you’ll be cursed…
Stand on the right…Walk on the left.
Closing the window on the bus if there is a person sitting next to (and owning) the window without asking them if it is ok to close it. Often, there is a good reason why people open the windows on the bus: to avoid feeling stuffy because of 40 people breathing in a 10 meters square box, or even better, to avoid smelling the rotten banana or …see number 4.
To close or not to close the window…That is the question.
Eating bananas/crisps/Mac Donald in the bus/tube. It is smelly, it is stinky, it can get loud. It is very easy to feel dizzy in a bus that starts and stops every two minutes. Now imagine this poor stomach shaking drastically with a horrific nightmarish smell of banana and old Mac Donald fries…Please. Don’t. Please.
Niam. Delicious rotten banana smell. [iStock photo]
Coughing, sneezing, etc. without covering your mouth. Life is too short and we are too busy in London to catch a cold. Londoners would generally rather use their illness leave to go on holidays than actually be ill at home with a blocked nose, 40 degrees, and a sore throat.